eye all seeing

oooooohhhhhheeeeiiiioooooooo.

that is the spooky sound.
that is the spooky sound because i am READING THE FUTURE. i am reading it in chinese, though, so it's a bit hard to understand.

see, i'm doing this job where i am editing/translating/writing next year's chinese horoscopes for a calendar. as a yang water rat, i am destined to do a good job at this because i am forthright and meticulous. my natural scepticism when it comes to things like astrology will have no effect on my efforts at all. i bow to the stars! i swim with the rats! i am also sure to make a bazillion dollars because it seems like the stars are planning on shining on my efforts. at least if the chinese woman who's material i'm working from is to be believed.

that's awrsome. a bazillion dollars! i can afford diamond studded contact lenses!

i'd like to thank the stars, and my wife, and all the little people, especially peter dinklage.

last week i wrote a press release for this guy ian who makes nifty fruit bowls that look like palm fronds.

next week i will be writing the letter "q" over and over until i see the face of god.

it's a living.

actually, i've got these jobs because my mate ruth had to take her maternity leave a bit earlier than planned and she passed some of her clients off to me. she's got a wee wee baby (two months early, but healthy, whew!) named scarlett. i've got chinese horoscopes to write. it's almost the same thing. both are the future in practically identical ways.

here in the antipodes we're thinking about moving house. we heard back from our "landlord" and he "says" that he "won't fix shit" and he's still going to raise our rent by "more than is right" and that he needs to rest his "quote fingers" before he gets a "repetitive stress injury." we responded by giving him the thumbs up sign because we learned in Ghana that means, "your mother."

basically, they're raising our rent so much that it might be worthwhile finding something just a wee bit more expensive but much nicer. our lil terrace house will soon be priced almost as much as places in awrsomer suburbs such as north carlton and north fitzroy. places, say, with heat and a reliable oven and within walking distance of downtown.

we're not yet sure we can find one of these places and then convince the landlords to let us rent it, but we have some time. until the end of october, at least, when our lease ends and the rent jumps 10%. then we can always go month to month or just suck it up and stay where we are.

as a yang water rat, my inclination is move, but to move into a damp sewer pipe on the maribyrnong river. mostly because after a year i can now pronounce "maribyrnong."

my wife is sick again. i think she has rickets. or maybe it's a sinus infection. but it's probably rickets.