July 2007 Archives

last night (my second to last here in the united states) we went out for a sushi feast at Tsunami. rachel made the reservation. robert selected the sake. les ordered the fish. ron made a special effort to escape babylandia to join us.

and together we ate and drank and drank and then we drank more.

i've been in town for a few weeks and that was one of the first times i felt like i belonged here. there was no small talk about how i like australia. there was no time pressure to make the most of scheduling. i just got to hang out with friends.

that's what i've missed most while in australia; the casual, nothing doing, no pressure, having a laugh with friends (and family).

i'm learning that these quick trips home are not conducive to fulfilling that need. no matter how long i'm back in SF for, i'll be here as a temporary visitor because now i live in australia. and while i can expect to have the stars align once or twice for an evening like last night, i can't really expect to just step back into my old life again.

before this trip, i felt like a san franciscan who was trying to live in australia. now i realize that i'm a melbournian who used to live in san francisco.

i didn't come home. i went away and tomorrow i'm going home.

maybe this shift in perception will help me invest more in my australian life? it's hard to tell with a raging sake hangover.

i'm in detox.

in the past two evenings, i've seen two friends who mean a bunch to me. not just "good to drop beers with" friends, but "sure, i really only needed one kidney anyway" friends.

one of them just busted up with his fiancée. the other is dealing with a wife with intense medical issues and a newborn.

ha ha ha.

i live in australia. that's far away from here. it feels really really far away when i try to think about what i can do to help my friends out.

for the first, dropping a couple of beers and listening and talking actually seemed pretty spot on. it's been a while since i had something resembling my old advice mojo working, but i think i was on my game with him. he's going to be fine after the requisite sorrow and self-doubt. for the second friend, the best i could come up with was dinner on me.

dinner? how is that going to help? i want to organize babysitting shifts, or fly in medical experts, or something effective but all i could think up was free dinner and a "call me any time."

i feel pretty useless when i should be anything but.

on the positive side, i'm thinking about the three bears. how some porridge is too hot, and some too cold, but some is just right. in this analogy i'm goldilocks and my wife is porridge, which may not sound like a big compliment but oh-boy is it.

i'm sorry she's not in town today. i could use some just right.

it's a bit like the walk of shame, returning here to troublonia after partying all night over at the Live Earth Blog. i know i've neglected you and i'm sorry. i just couldn't help myself. one thing led to another and then, well, i stayed the night.

the whole Live Earth thing was pretty awesome. liked the job. liked my cow-orkers. liked the show. liked writing the blog. the only thing i didn't like was getting wacko email from super wackos, but hey, wackos have to write to someone. otherwise they might lose their wacko street cred.

in any case, Live Earth is over; both the concerts and my gig. and i'm in San Francisco walking about familiar neighborhoods that are filled with unfamiliar shops and restaurants. i cannot believe how much turnover this city has had in just a year! where's Izumi, my favorite sushi place? gone. sob. lament.

my darling wife flies in today from melbourne and i'm excited to go fetch her from the airport. this is the longest we've been apart since we were married near two years ago. actually, since we were married, we haven't been apart for more than about 8 hours, so two weeks apart is kinda significant.

what i have learned from this wife-vacation is:
1) i miss my wife.
2) it's good to miss your wife occasionally.
3) i can very easily take over most of a queen-sized bed.

i'm also spending a bunch of time thinking about how i feel about america and san francisco. people ask me when i'm moving back and i really don't know (except not for at least three years unless something extra screwy happens). i think what i've figured out is:

i miss america, but not the american bits of it.