No Sleep
i will not sleep until we reach brooklyn.
what? oh. i mean:
no. sleep! till BROOKLYN!
get off the bus. you're wild man, wild. you're a little wild. really. just a heads up. you're wildish. or maybe you just need some sleep?
no. getting out of bed! till BROOKLYN!
boy. i wish i could pull that off. but since we're not going to brooklyn until memorial day weekend, that would mean bed sores. bed sores are just so last year. not sexy at all any more.
bed head is still kind of sexy, though. and bedroom eyes? hella sexy. bed pan? not sexy.
but yeah. in the midst of a day of customer service hell, i did indeed secure passage on an aeroplane for myself and my betrothed to a nice little place named after our philanderingest president, John F. Kennedy.
since my brother lives in brooklyn and the diabolical dr. hess lives in brooklyn with brandonia and e and gaby's around there somewheres and cousin dan lives in hell's kitchen, we figure, heck. we're at JFK, we might as well leave the airport and see new york. it's all the rage these days.
bartlebee has never even been to new york before. she's a virgin. that's supposed to be sexy, but i'm going with not sexy. virgins like blink 182 and were born in the nineties. or are engaged to jesus.
can you even imagine planning a wedding with jesus? that would totally suck. the guest list would be fucking out. of. control.
what do you mean i'm not invited? jesus LOVES me!
i asked my brother to arrange a riot for bartlebee in new york. and a parade. everyone loves a parade. most people love riots. especially a laugh-riot.
i think i can wait until the end of may for a vacation. based on yesterday though, i am not so sure. yesterday was balls. balls to yesterday.
we bought this DV deck for the symphony. it sucks. it doesn't work so good. the place we bought it from said to call JVC, the manufacturer, for warranty repair.
that didn't go so well. i must have mistakenly called the number for Warrant-y repair because i got bad hair rock customer service.
when i finally got a (and i use this term lightly) woman on the phone, she told me that the machine wasn't broken at all. it played one tape fine, so the fact that it wouldn't play most other tapes -- even though those tapes played fine on other decks -- meant there was no defect. when i tried to explain the problem to her via an analogy, that a television that receives channel 5 but no other channel isn't in good working order, she very coherently responded by hanging up on me.
when i called back she pretended to be someone else. so i pretended like i wasn't furious. it was a fun little game. eventually she told me to take the deck to an authorized repair center.
the closest of which is in san jose.
ha ha ha. i love JVC. does that website that lets you mail people turds still exist?
in contrast, United Airlines was helpful and friendly. i bought my ticket via expedia and bartlebee's dad got bartlebee a ticket using frequent traveler miles. then i called UA and tried to get us seats together.
the very nice woman went and pulled some strings and got us seats together, then she warned me that she'd pulled strings so if the schedule changed i'd have my seat bumped so i should check in again a week before the flight.
thank you United Airlines lady!
no mail-turd for you!
today i'm in a better mood.
how could i not be? warrant is releasing a new album and they look as rockin' as ever!
