Lies

okay, this whole lie thing is not working out so well for me. i just can't really come up with anything.

i can tell you this. i think ajax and shannon and me will be meeting for alcoholic beverages next week. that's sort of interesting. you know, bloggers meeting for the first time and then swearing an oath never to blog about it. or not. maybe they swear to blog about it in intricate detail, building a whirlwind of blog-interest that will swirl around the internet, sucking in poor unfortunate surfers who were just trying to see pictures of brittany spears sucking horse cock.

these people, they're innocent! they don't want to read about meeting other bloggers! but i will have no mercy. i will label my post, "brittney spears sucks horse cock" and they will fall into my trap.

yes. i realize that i just spelled brittany two different ways. why? 'cause i don't know how to spell! yet, i have that mystical sway thing going for me...

so, speaking of horse cock, did you see that picture of britteanoy speirs nipple? wasn't that exciting? i guess she had a "wardrobe malfunction" and one of her girls slipped out. i actually think it was exciting. why? because if you saw it you would be one-hundred percent abso-fuckin-lutely certain that she's had stuff injected into her knockers to make em all big and poofy. they call it a "boob job."

boob job. what the hell is that? i think a boob job is feeding infants, right? that's a boob job. a nose job is sniffing smelly stuff.

this is a weird gaddamned world. boob jobs! hah! i'm just glad there's no cock job. there are, however, lots of nut jobs. if someone is a nut job, does that mean they have gi-normous testicles? gross.

also, while i'm rambling incoherently, how come women go to the gynacologist all the damn time but men don't go to the cock doctor? are hootchies that much more complex? maybe, i guess. i don't have one. i know my wanger is always demanding attention...

wanger! that's funny too! also, cock-doctor is really fun to say.

try it. stand on your desk and say loudly, "cock doctor."

i bet people laugh.

i would like to apologize for this post. it really sucks the big wanger.