Hibernation

i've begun hibernating for the winter. but i still got lured out to the bar tonight, to talk with a new friend.

she told me why she didn't want love and why art needs to be ugly and why she needed her time to spend helping the world and why love is selfish and why people are cruel and romance a joke.

and, yeah, i told her it was all a big stinky crock of shit. that she was desperate to be in love but doing everything in her power to pretend like she wasn't. that everything she said was just smoke. sometimes i'm like that. i'll listen to what someone says and call them a liar to their face. because occassionally you need to wrestle the truth out of people and...

oh. i don't know.

i remember lisa, whom i loved once, and how she used to look me in the eye and call me on my lies. on the lies i told myself. i loved her for that.

and it's winter. and really all i want to do is dole out big hugs. and stay in bed until spring.

it's officially belle & sebastian out. that's for damn sure.