Exile
i bought Exile on Main Street again today. my copy was scratched and kept skipping during Loving Cup. can't have that.
i also bought Metamorphosis, which is an older Stones album, recorded back before brian jones died a mysterious death in his pool. as mick was wrestling the stones away from him. see, the stones were brian's band, not mick's. but brian fucked up. overdid the lsd. and keith and brian both loved anita pallenberg. sometimes someone has to step out.
i love the stones. not that hot rocks shit but their blues. if you've only heard them on the radio, do yourself a favor and buy Exile on Main Street. If you can listen to Let it Loose and not love the stones, give up.
i had dinner this week with fancy. she and i were a thing in 2000 but we had to part ways when her ex came back and wanted to marry her. out of the blue. she also loves the stones and we used to lie in bed and listen to the second half of Tattoo You, or this mix i made for us called Mick in Bed. full of songs they don't play on the radio; tracks that made me want to roll over and kiss the back of her neck.
everytime i see fancy, i have to remind myself that we're not an item any more. the juice still exists between us and we both know how to flirt. but no, she lives with her man now. so we just flirt around the edge of dangerous. although sometimes i have to bite my lip and count back from ten.
i also saw the queen of amazonia on friday. the woman who made me feel better and worse than any other. we walked in the park together. it was the first normal conversation we've had since she walked into my room and told me she loved me and didn't know what to do. but i suppose you either know that whole story or will just have to wonder, because i'm not telling it here. maybe you know it because you're one of the garbage men who found the letters i wrote to her but threw away. one of those big brawny men in coveralls, crying in the filthy alley because of the way i felt about her. and because our love got put down in its prime.
we walk in the park, the king and queen of amazonia in exile. we say 'it's just so normal to be with you.' but it's really just so abnormal to have her gone. and that's the way it'll stay except for the odd walk in the park. once every half year or so. because what exists between us was planted in a too small pot. on purpose. and we say, 'wouldn't it be nice to do this every week. every day.' but know we can't. we say, 'it's great to see you. see you again in january,' because that's the way it is. too much sun, too much water; we'll need a bigger pot. we can't have a bigger pot.
she's someone else's queen. and i'm listening to mick put his heart into it. singing exile.
Bit off more than I can chew and I knew what it was leading to,
Some things, well, I can't refuse, (oh i can't)
One of them, one of them the bedroom blues.
and yeah, let it loose, let it all come down.
let it loose.
